Home

soooo hectic.....everyday back at home is like a whole new experience on its own......ten things accomplished in 24 hours instead of three.......

everything has changed.....my friends, my house, my family, my life, hongkong, and me........theres so much going on....i don't have time to waste and blog...

Luck to phyfound.

~~~ Our Lady Peace - Imagine (live) ~~~

Its weird, i'm actually a pretty logical person....but i was thinking to myself just now....how come i hate pictures of any sort - related to human flesh and stuff......its only natural right??....so it should be ok to see natural things rite?!..

I heard from somebody that if you close your eyes and say 'home' ten times, you might open your eyes to find out that you just woke up at home on a Sunday.......................................dope......nevamind...

I'm up again.....to hide away from the evil karma that spreads into every BME whose irritated by the amount and difficulty of this class.........not that the material is super duper hard, but its definitely a hell of a lot..........and yeah, the thing is that its actually only basic BME stuff.....i personally think its a lil too much for me to handle.....but then again, this is hopkins bme, i have no more to say......this stuff should really be for those that have a deep appreciation for biology and engineering....

Haha....if this can only be a guitar exam instead, i'd be busy practicing day in day out throughout the year.......killing all exams as i see.....
While i'm on the subject of doing things that you like/appreciate......i think i'm definitely a loser when it comes to this category.......i know what i want all the time, but i never happen to be doing that when it comes to work......studying all sorts of random math, science, bio, blah blah has never really been my thing.........i just kinda study it.....cuz its called work......and you're not supposed to like it........i sorta just suck up whateva i need to study.....learn whateva is given to get through it............sometimes, i wonder if i'll ever be satisfied with the work i have in my life.......especially, after college, when i finally find a job out there in the real world........i know i have so much drive and self-motivation when it comes to something i like (for example music)......but what about doing something that'll let me get a good paycheck too??..........every once in a while, i wonder to myself.... i just have to have hope.........i just have to rely on the fact that this world is sooooo damn big, theres so much money going around.....and that there'll be one position out there that'll make the best out of me ( and also gimme that fat paycheck).....

I want to write about daily thingys here......its been a while since i've blogged about some more simpler issues like what i've been doing and all........the thing is, there really isn't much tho.......i study when i'm up.....i eat when i must.....and i avoid work by sleeping long hours til i can't fall asleep anymore...........period...........shit, what else is there to say?.......erm.......some more less important things include my guitar strings broke........i fell on my ass cuz of some ice on the floor..........i sold my new mp3/cd player and cell fone on ebay and plan to get new ones when i go back home..........erm.........some even less important things includes: i've been averaging 3 bottles of water a day....i've been watching men & women NCAA soccer on ESPN.......oh yeah, and also, i'm trying to waste time and avoid studying by talking about irrelevant matters on my blog......

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....
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haha....i'm an A+ when it comes to keeping myself entertained.....

Anywayz......time for some music everybody??.......lemme see......wah i got for you all today........
~~~ Dishwalla - Every Little Thing ~~~......i don't quite remember if i put this one on before.......erm........yeah.....i'll choose another just in case i did before already.......
~~~ Travis - Side ~~~.....ok....if i've already put this one up too before.....then i'm sorry, life will have to go on for you.....

bye.

Back. It seriously took a bit this time to push myself to come up here. Haha.....phyfound? or blog? that is the question....haha....believe me (giving you the stern look)....I was soooo close to phyfound......unimaginably close.....i guess, it was this guys xanga that tipped the iceberg......for the first time in my life, I read a diary that actually made sense to me.....theres still hope...theres still ppl out there that have a clear honest true character...

I need to study....yes, i do....so much to learn and so lil brain to do it.....there seems to be a constant battle inside my head to push myself to sit at the studying table to start studying.....this one time during this week of studying, i pushed myself so hard i felt sick....I keep telling myself, theres only one exam left (ok, the hardest one by far too)....i tell you, this is exactly what goes on inside my head.....INSIDE: just this little bit more left airik!!....push push push....don't fall now airik!!...you're so close....push push push......if you want to show you're strong you push it.........don't let anything stop you.....just push on and you'll be fone....
So yeah, i'm currently dead sick......homesick too.....i miss home...my life back home...my friends......hongkong is seriously my source of confidence.......to know that I have a whole life back home waiting for me every break.......And more importantly, after I get out of my supposedly good education in america....it makes me feel so much better........
I haven't been home for too long....i need to go back and make stuff happen the way it used to be always when i go back.....

hah...its funny how since i made it to hopkins, i never thought studying a week before a midterm/exam was unusal....(ok, i feel like i'm backtracking my earlier phyfound thoughts........

.....
....wow....
....
....i have stuff to say again....holy god.....i actually feel like writing.....
......
....thats what i've been trying to say again and again for the past couple months....that feeling of wanting to write....
....)

.....anywayz, yeah.......i sound like i'm crazy when i tell people i plan to study usually a week or half a week before my tests depending on the difficulty of the test......i always thought most ppl spent that much time too......

this leads me to my 2nd thing.......i'm glad I found out who i am this semester......yep...when you goto college, you do find that you have your own path to take....whilst in the middle of your own, you find that everybody is just taking their own path......they do cross yours....meet up with yours...try to mess with yours.........for better part, I know what i'm doing........as much as i am an outkast.....as much as ppl tell me I'm wrong for what i am (yes, and thank those ppl....i do look at myself and sculpt myself accordingly).......i know what i'm doing...........i know my goals.....i know i'm living the way i'm supposed to.....its definitely not perfect....i am wrong everyday......let me say again, if that i didn't make myself clear enough.....i am wrong all the time!!!........the thing is i have control over myself every single individual day......every tomorrow, I live to live a better life that i previously did......not to only make up for the past....but for the better well being of myself and those that would appreciate that better well being of mine.......

"if i want to talk, I would first have to spend all my time defending what needs to be said".....i don't want to waste my time having to defend what i have to say this time.........whether it is taken the correct way or not... i cannot judge.....i can only hope those that don't would take the time to understand....

there are ppl in this world that can't face the reality.......there are also a lot of ppl in this world that can't face up to the things they do or say........they avoid/back up what they have behind the light...behind what they think of as "too real" or too much to deal with..... they deem themselves as too chill to have the guts to have things the way they want in an honest open fashion.......and to answer all your prayers before more 'uptite' or any other such symbols are called out behind the curtain, i would like to open any discussion regarding anything i do say........i'm sorry, but not being able to confront your personal dislikes is just sad.....not to mention, not understanding that you're only a dislike of yourself is even worse.........all in all, don't be fake.....and don't hate...

to respond to those that are 'chill':......why are you going to class?? why do you goto skool??..why do you take exams??...why don't you just sit on your ass so that your parents can pay for the rest of your nonexistant education?.....or have you been contradicting yourself with what you've been labeling others with?

phyfound needs me.

Erik.

i dunt come up here nemore......things have changed.....i don't have the urge to blog nemore...i think i have better things to do now......i think i've changed both in some ways more and in some ways less this semster....its hard to explain....its crazytalk.....definitely living alone at my lovely apartment has influenced the way i am and think.......

I think i've become back to more of a serious person (uptight!! yes!!) this semester.....so much more determined and straight forward with what needs to be done....I feel thats more erik....thats the way i've always been, and it seems like life works better for me this way......'to chill' is like something i've been through during phases and i guess its just not my thing........a reason why i say this is because I look back to my previous blogs.....and i was just thinking how immature i was then......its like, no matter what i say, I've opened myself to signs of stubborness..........however, before, i used to look back at my blogs and liked exactly what i wrote on each and every blog...
Then again.....its just a thought.....maybe i'm still the punk i was......

~~~ Lifehouse - Spin ~~~......repeated again and again on my comp....its darn good......my world makes much more sense when i listen to this song.......its been keeping me alive....

I'M GOING HOME SOON. WOW.

i love thanxgiving....i do.....i remember a couple years back.....back in the day of misery...those same ol days at northfield......i always had such a good time during thxngiving........going to NYC....visiting my bro......going shopping...eating at nice restaurants......those are the type of times i'll always remember........they go by sooooo quickly too....but yet, after its over, in your memory you feel like that was the longest time ever...so action packed...did so much shit.........the thing is, its only a weekend like everyother each week.............its like, when you go back to skool....meet back up with hell.....you feel like you were away for two weeks or something.......thats what a good time is all about....hehe....azn jackass....

aite...late.
one of couple last blogs.
Erik

Airik: dude man
this sounds like the gayest shit
but ev and you are fukin great
i honestly don't think my life would be half as much without you guyz
Ron: hahhaha what's the sudden burst of emotion but true same here
Airik: when life sux
Airik: i can turn to you two foos
Airik: thats fukin what life should be all about
Airik: the connection between one and other
Airik: none that fukin material shit we have
Airik: or want to own
Ron: yeah man that's what friends are for that's why i always watch friends
Airik: .........
Airik: ok
Airik: you can go away now
Airik: gonna find ev
Ron: fucl you man

my computer broke down yesterday......58 viruses....an assortment of medulla, something horse, and mostly worm klez h......was bad...this is something i hate.....to wake up and findout your computer is messed up....and then to spend the rest of the day fixing it....
In the end, i had no choice but to format my drive.....ahn jo man.....all cuz of that stupid email attachment.......it might as well just eat me.....

I hate food......food sux.....

ok...i figured...since i spent so much time figuring out how to put my pics up.......
i wanted to emphasize how red my hair used to be....

Haha.....this is weird as hell....i hate pics....but here it is..........and 'YES', i know a lot of you (the ladies) will think it used to be so much better.......but too bad for you!!!...haha...

BEFORE





AFTER

I buzzed my hair......haha.....all my red highlights are gone......this probably doesn't mean much to some guyz that have short hair.....but for me, for a person that hasn't ever had short hair in his life.....its different.........hehe......i like it...its clean.....its 'kyo'......its a change........it was actually a one day decision, haha, during phyfound (yeah, when else would i been thinking about stuff like that??)....more random spontaneous acts of mine i guess........but yeah, i know so many of you just can't imagine me with my hair short like that.......i will definitely put up 'before and after' photos when i get them together and stuff.......and for now??....you'll just have to let your imagination run wild for a bit......

thanksgiving is coming.......holy god......wats going to happen??.......holygod.......i'm excited........its been a while guyz........i can only imagine the best of highskool memories (fuck northfield...like there were many memories there)......but yeah, a big *smile* =))))))))))))))

Many great songs for the moment......erm.....its gonna be a special day today........3 songs for the day......not to show less respect for any of them at all.....but i figured it'll take a while for me to put them all up considering how less frequently i blog now....
~~~ Incubus - Drive ~~~....so many of you have definitely heard of this one.........well, i just realized it was such an awesome song a while ago.....i especially like the guitaring throughout the song (starting from the intro).............
~~~ Airlock - Awakening ~~~....thank my all-time-blog-maker for this song.....its good....more chill for the soul......actually, its the better the more you hear it.....if you need more chill stuff w/vocals....chek it.............
~~~ the Avalanches - Since I left you ~~~......yet, another chill song....i actually like this one more...its definitely a lot more well known too........erm....yeah, its good.....what else to say??
~~~ Queens of the Stone Age - No one knows ~~~......dave grohl back drumming......i like.

I'm done with all my summer apps......woohoo.....nicenice....did take up some free-time throughout the last couple weekends...but its finally all over........its great.....just 3 exams, thanksgiving and i'm off back to home.....home sweet home.......heard from my bro theres been some changes in my house too....so i can't wait to check it all out.......

Lifes been good for the most part....cept for the occasional "normal" bad days....everything has been great....just doing my thing.....getting stuff done.....chillin as i go......anywayz..its time for the weekly black man's steak.....so gotta run and grab da shit....will try post pics asap.

Airik

Lemon Jelly and Craig David new albums.....nicenice.

I completely forgot all my German....i used to know enough German to have basic conversations with ppl, but i completely lost it now....i haven't spoken German since highskool in HongKong....and that was like......friggin 5 years ago.......as much as i want to look at that stuff once again, theres too much other stuff I would probably be better off doing instead......for example, practice some of my mandarin or just generally learning new things and new skills........German would probably be one of the less important languages in my life (i can't be for sure, but thats what it seems like).......given the intensity of my curriculum at hopkins, i highly doubt i'll have the chance to take some german classes (not some, but not even one).....haha....goodbye German (as in the language)......10 years of that stuff......i think i'm more than halfway recycling that memory in my mind already.......so i guess i might as well just let it....

I've been living a somewhat efficient life for the past week...always busy doing stuff.....healthy stuff...hehe....i relax a bit every once in a while, but I spend most of the time working and getting my stuff together......i guess i can't bum too much (uptight?!)......can't procrastinate....its not one of my skills i suppose ^^.......i feel useless if i relax for too long.....i feel like i can be doing better things with my time......like anything, wash my clothes, more practice on the guitar, look up work related stuff........yeah, i hate the feeling of being behind.....or the feeling when everybody but I, is doing stuff......

my blog has gotten shitty.....maybe cuz theres too much deeper thoughts in it these dayz......less simple diary-like thingys......i dunno......i can't really be bothered to make it nice, clean and evened out or whateva......i'll just let it flow...

no music for the day...haha....

AIERIK. go eat now!

I'm a B-logger....inside my log, theres no match...the catch?....its becuz i'm all alone....all airik...fully fukin blown....maximized on your screen....nobody to pick a screen......I can talk my shit....nobody will bitch.....tho, this log is never to pick fights......its a place for me to ramble at my height.....talk about what music is tite.....i see it like my back yard hoop.....its the same loop.....i come here once in while to practice my shoot....the catch?....i choose to share it with the public.....i'm proud of what i am....just another man....good or bad you can see it through the video cam......i hear good music, i say 'damn'.....you find a new entry and you shout 'nice shit man'.......

alrite...enuff...haha.......i only have that much time to blog.......got work??.....hehe.......stupid summer job apps.........but anyhow, haha...writing rythmes are hella fun.....don't take long after you get used to it too.....only takes 10 min or so to write a paragraph like this......

I honestly dunno why i came up.....i just felt like it......i really should be getting a shower or better yet, watching the european MTV awards rite now.........hmmm........here we go first of all........~~~ Utada Hikaru - Simple and Clean ~~~.......its the theme to the disney and squaresoft 'Kingdom Hearts' game.......anybody played it??.......the cc definitely looks awesome......all the disney characters and stuff......

aiteaite....the evil monster (television) is seriously driving me away from my blog.......will go now..

Erik.

8 Mile was real and inspiring. I feel it, what we can do with our lives....what we live on to get us going...everyone of us have our own moments, our own dreams....its crazy.....to live in our each and individual worlds.......everyonce in a while, i really wonder how it would be like to live somebody elses........
this might sound a lil stupid, egoistic...and worst of all, sound like every other guy that says the same thing.....but i'm gonna live upto my dream....i want to be successful, somewhat rich, happy and to someday feel that i have my life and my world under control......even though uptil this day, i still might not know exactly what i want but i definitely have a good idea of what i feel and what i can do......i know i can succeed in whateva i want to do.......its all within.....

Some deutsch pride........y'all check this shit out......its some quality foreign stuff.....~~~ Freundeskreis - Mit Dir ~~~.....chek dat deutsch hiphop rnb out......

HAha....boycotting......like eggs rotting.....so old they're gonna be thrown....thinking you gonna be owning......this world is international, its only rational.......fobby shit malicious....haha i find it fukin facetious.......cuz thats lame as fuck.....lemme give you a pacifier to suck.....you lame ass faggot.....you're outta luck...dat shit ain't gonna make me split.....you immature piece of shit.....this no ballad........its a fukin rap......so check my map......dat crap is not gonna make me give a crap......go home and sit on your slutty moms lap.......and don't slap back.....you're not shaq......you're a pussy unanswering lil brat......i'm done with that shit......scared little bitch.....i grew up being thrown those hits........i'm over the wall.....i'm not gonna trip on your tiny balls......i have them at lunch everyday, spaghetti and meatballs........its not gonna ever be your way......as long as i'm here, you sit and stay......goody doggy dear.......stay here and don't piss on your pants queer......now i'm done with my beef....so next time jeez, don't do that intentionally to pull my leaves......its not cool, dont live life like you gotta rule....you stop, and i'll stop yule.

Aiteaite...tired.

How is everybody today? =)

Don't get me wrong...i'm not in a good mood today....well, not in a bad one either.....just one of those dayz i suppose......i went to class, ate.....worked.....spent most of the day on campus i believe.....the funny thing is i haven't had a conversation with anybody today....only til now i realize i was on campus doing my own thing all day, didn't interact much with anybody other than nodding my head to say 'hi'..........i think i hate these dayz, they're boring......i spend half the time conversing with myself....and the other half in silence....

I stress agian, if i haven't made my point clear enuff last nite.....I'm goin to make the most out of my time from now til thxngiving.....want to straight things out.....i want to be as complete as i can be.....and i want to be on track with how i want my life to roll out....

I haven't been up here for a bit.....so i'm gonna give a quick 'Whats inside Erik's mp3 list' over the past week or so:
The Reelists - Freak Mode
Hyde - Shallow Sleep (j-rock)
Jimmy Eat World - the middle (acoustic version)
Walkmen - Wake up
Third Eye Blind - I Want You
Goo goo Dolls - Here is Gone
Garbage - Cherry Lips
The Roots - What they do
Maroon 5 -This Love

Aite, nap time.
Airik.

I really should be sleeping or studying rite now.....we have so little time to waste in our lives.....to come and think about it, i never understood why i started blogging......i have so many more important things to do like work and skool and straightening out my life (ok, maybe i can consider blogging straigtening my life)....but still.......at least for the past week or so, i've been feelin that i haven't been using my time efficiently enough.......i should be constantly doing something, and most of this time should be spent on skool work (I HATE PHYSFOUND BTW).....

Was down at philly last weekend......was way cool.....chek jon's joint out.....i love 'typical' colleges......so cool....so chill.....mad love for chilling........old skool shitz...winning11...bballing....haha ("Bet thats the first time an azn do that shit to you").......that shit we talked over again and again......they just hoes man....they just hoes..........dunt need to give a F...

really need sleep...will be back.

....in this world....we live the slaves of our own creations......

Theres seriously absolutely no understanding whatsoever......its as if the connection between each and every individual is bounded by a brick wall......the sad thing is that I believe i see so much greatness between every one of us.....when i'm say 'greatness', i mean anything more than one person can accomplish.....its neither something of only materialistic value nor a self accomplished task........the reason behind that is that it takes at least one more person to appreciate the traits or skills of others.......

Our relationships are such fragile connections.....one wrong phrase, one wrong action can shatter it into pieces....a broken glass window that will never be exactly the same anymore no matter how well put back together.....I wonder if theres anything in this world called a "plastic window" relationship....elastic, hard.....and definitely takes more than a blow to put it apart....

Its either me, i'm just wrong.....or i see mobile problems around me everyday....these problems speak, act, and sometimes even don't make sense to me.....i'm not saying problems are bad, i mean, i have problems too......but most of time, not acting for the good of it just disturbs me.........we shall all learn to live and grow better lives within each of our individual lifes........

Its sad to see that those that are crazy or deviant are seen as outkasts......especially those that share their lives for the well being of this world and what it means to them......the most simplest things in this world...the most wacky, nitty, crazed things in this world have A LOT of meaning behind them.....(crazy is defined as 'wrong' in my dictionary, thats what i just mean as really wrong)......Theres so much appreciation in this world.....so much greatness......why aren't we focusing on stuff like that rather than satisfication through our own created problems......the more we live our supposedly life, the more problems we create for ourselves....

Everything was so much simpler when you were young........but as we grow up....we tend to lose the ability to be honest and truthful......all our experiences get complicated every time you come around it again.....

Now i'm asking myself. What can i do to make this life of mine better? or better yet, make everything around me better??.....i hate complaining....when i hear people complain, i always tell them to think about how-to make it better from then on........so now, i'm gonna ask myself how to put an end to my own misery........i definitely can't go around telling people i'm going to be different, cuz i'm definitely going to get a "Airik is going crazy" response......i'm gonna stfu when i should.....i'm gonna be helpful, generous, have a positive attitude all the time, continue to believe in the 'greatness', and make the best for both yours and my life. (haha..sounds like i'm writing some sort of mission statement).......

i shall believe....

Erik.
- i shall turn to music with others and not for its relief from others -

Us again.....

Sukendar: http://www.cnn.com/2002/US/West/10/18/offbeat.alaska.bird.reut/index.html
Ec4K: hah
Sukendar: believe?
Ec4K: course
Sukendar: mutant terrorist
Ec4K: ....
Ec4K: stop tryin to make it to my blog

Airik's Apartment

Enjoying a lil yogurt-on-a-knife rite now as i blog......hahaha.......so chill.....i got phyfound to study and i'm basically not doin much about it......but oh well......yeah, back to my yogurt-on-a-knife........haha......saving some of my plastic cutlery.......i got this big box of plastic cutlery (yes, for the lazy me) at costco, with spoons...knives....and forks.....its great, all easily disposable after your meal.....but yeah, my cutlery box is starting to become uneven........i have a lotta of knives, some forks and not that many spoons left.....so therefore, i'm making myself eat my yogurt with a knife to balance the box back.....sounds very stupid (haha..like always), but i've been tryin very hard to make myself live a 'perfect' live.......and of course, my apartment needs to be perfect too.......everything needs to be in its place at the right moment at the right time........

Theres this friggin fly in my apartment.....its hella bothering me......i want to be alone....i wanna do my own thing, and its driving me nuts.....for the past two weeks, i've been using this scented candle to drive him away from areas of my apartment i don't want him to be......the problem however, is that it doens't wanna leave the place in general......its not like i'm not washing my dishes, not throwing my trash away, i have no clue why its still around.......i leave my window and door open so that i get a lot of air flow in the apartment, but still it doesn't leave.........
I actually caught this lil nuisance once in the living room.....it was on the ceiling and it didn't move, so i used a transparent plastic bowl to trap it against the ceiling.......the problem after that was that i didn't know what i should do next........i wanted to somehow bring him down from the ceiling, but i couldn't move because i was tip toeing so that i could reach the ceiling.....it was tough, i had to slowly move across to the dining table where i could grab a piece of paper and get on top of a chair to slide a piece of paper over the bowl to bring him down...........my muscles were seriously straining cuz i had to make sure the bowl was completely over the fly all throughout......so yeah, i finally had him in between the piece of paper and bowl.......i had two choices: 1. Run out into other end of the hallway of the floor in the apartment, and let him out 2. TORTURE HIM!! for annoying me......so yep, my decision is obvious.....i couldn't think of how i'd do it tho, it was flying all over the place inside the bowl.......the first thing that came to my head was to drown it in the sink, it was stupid......basically i turned on the faucet and hoped that the water would soak through the paper and slowly fill up the bowl so the fly would be trapped and would finally drown............the problem was that water didn't soak through.....and i dunno how, but somewhere along my failure it flew back into my apartment.....

Today, i went to supermarket.....and i got some air freshner and flying insects insecticide.......the first thing i did when i got home was to walk all over my apartment with my spraying air freshner (i somehow believe flys hate stuff that smells good, my insecticide was my special weapon...haha..).....but yeah, as idiotic as it sounds.....i was suffocating from the air freshner....maybe i over did it or something but it was giving me a headache.....

Airik Apartment End.

~~~ David Tao - Kitrina ~~~ erm....good song??..need i say much??...its english....its simple...its a guitar song....i actually wrote a song right after i heard it....its very similar......i don't want to fill up my blog with my music, so just ask me if you wanna see the chords and the lyrics...

Oh, and also....i got muffins, eggs, cheese and ham at the supermarket today too...i can't wait til breakfast tomorrow....its all mine, all mine...

Its very interesting to see that airik's blog is suddenly amazingly active...

Ec4K: did i tell you?
Sukendar: tell what?
Ec4K: i'm fukin in love with music now
Ec4K: well
Ec4K: if you read my blog
Sukendar: yeah i slept with it
Ec4K: you'll prob figure that out already
Sukendar: ...wtf
Ec4K: hahaha
Ec4K: seriously man
Ec4K: you remember that canto movie?
Ec4K: the weird one
Ec4K: the guy sleeps with the BB gun?
Ec4K: i'd sleep with my guitar
Ec4K: haha
Sukendar: oh nic tse movie?
Ec4K: yeahyeah
Ec4K: that one
Ec4K: the one he's director
Sukendar: dun like that movie
Ec4k: ........
Ec4k: ........
Sukendar: you want indonesian song?
Sukendar: american indonesian song
Ec4K: nah
Ec4k: hahahah
Ec4K: i'm sorry
Sukendar: hahahahahahhaha
Sukendar: i thought you love music
Ec4K: i do
Ec4K: but not bothered
Ec4K: i know you only mean good for me
Ec4K: but its ok
Ec4K: haha
Sukendar: hahaha
Sukendar: fuck you slut
Sukendar: it sounds like thai i know
Ec4K: haha

If we really spend the time to think about why most parents scold and tell their kids off, its because THEY CARE.....we tend to think those that don't nag you, don't tell you anything you don't want to hear, treat you well, and just generally seem all chilled all the time are the ones that know whats going on.....its funny how most ppl think those are actually the ones that understand......think about it like this, if they really are the ones that understand and care, why aren't they critizing you??....could it be because they only want to be on your good side?
seriousyly....the next time when ever somebody tells you off for something you have done wrong and is too critical about what you do.....step back.....try think straight....and try understand where they are coming from......try understand most ppl in this world don't criticize others just to make themselves feel better.....but rather that they only just care......they only want the better for you.....they risking their relationship with you to make things better for you....

Ppl who talk may also be just as good listeners as the ones that don't........another common misperception.........people that talk like to share......people that don't talk have nothing to share......it really has nothin to do with them being more chill....more laid back.....and better people to talk to.......
ARgh...i can't be fuct to talk.....

~~~ Gitaroo - The Legendary Theme (Acoustic) ~~~...chill lil video game song.....easy two guitar parts....

Another song for all you music chillers......once again, from my fav "soothe me out" artist.....~~~ Zero 7 - This World ~~~....yepyep....for those that liked 'Destiny'...this one is great too!!....so chek it...

Just spent the last 4-5 hours on the web....chatting....downloading....sucking up my dsl like a boy with his new toy........so awesome....hehe...the wonders of the net......10 years from now, lets all imagine then what life was like back in the day when internet did not exist.........i mean, seriously....no aol, no icq.....talking to your friends only through the fone........no emails..so all offices have piles and piles of documents and memos........damn.....most us youngsters these dayz have already intergrated our lives with the web.........i can't imagine just how much more important it will be to us in the future......

I'm tired.....haha...too much comp today...boo to you readers....
late
airik.

Definitely more chats for the soul....cheers!!


Ec4K: so wsup
erick: not much yo
erick: just got back from bus law a bit ago
erick: its raining now
Ec4K: is it?
erick: yeah
erick: when me el and joe were coming back i twas
Ec4K: so wat u upto?
erick: not much
erick: just ordered some campusfood
erick: telling cindy about my little mermaid 2 story
erick: haha
erick: im STARVING!
erick: gotta do some intro to alg hw soon too
Ec4K: haha
Ec4K: mermaid?
erick: yeah
erick: like i had a rough frosh year
erick: so my mom sent me a care package with three dvds
erick: two normal ones
erick: and the last one was the little mermaid 2
erick: so i asked my bro about it
erick: and he said that he told her to get me any given sunday
erick: but she said no. i know what erick likes. and he likes little mermaid
erick: so i got it
erick: watched it a couple months later
erick: and i kinda liked it
erick: haha my mom knows me yo
erick: i like disney movies even if they are cheesy
Ec4K: haha
Ec4K: haaha

Its just another friday......yes...aka my rest day.......no class....no nuthing to do......its great.....its sorta like a head start to the weekend, gives me a little more breathing room before h/w sundays......

Eventho i constantly emphasize that this is my blog and i can do whateva a F about it......i feel pressured to write right now.......its been so long since i'be been up here.....i don't want to come here and lose the inspiration to blog........i'm scared this is the end.....an end to this blog...that really would be quite upsetting........its kinda like when you want to do something that you just can't do no more.........hopefully the fact that my DSL will be up at my apt soon it'll change.....

A song for the you ~~~ Craig David - Seven Days (Acoustic Version) ~~~ yes....you probably maybe all heard of this song....but the acoustic version of it???....its awesome......i saw the craig david episode of 'Music in Higher Places' on MTV a lil while ago......all his songs on his 'Born to do it' album played with an acoustic guitar....so cool so cool.........but yeah, I learned how to played 'seven days' on my baby too.......so sweet....

Finally wrote a brand new song on my comp.......its done....and its RnB style.......i finally figured out how to post pics and files on my blog....so i'lll do just that when i get my own DSL........yep, i got lyrics for it.....and made the whole song from scratch.....all me all me..hehe........Just one last problem.....I need a two singers....one male another female.....preferably with a soulful voice........record that on and its like complete complete....

Been messing with my tables a lot this week.....got myself a copy of DJ Qbert's - Do it Yourself Scratching DVD.....so i've been sitting in my living room in front of my tables practicing and practicing and practicing........hey, i'm getting significantly better at it too........its awesome....

Haha....i have no clue why i'm blogging about this......but i sorta started this new bad habit of mine since i've gotten back to skool......been listennin to a lot of hip hop and rap these dayz (A LOT of Eminem)......and somewhere along, i was like 'wow, wouldn't it be cool if i could freestyle to some phat beats'....just chillin you know, do some of that Jin tha shit......like, i know that stuff comes from all practice.......you just gotta listen to a lot of freestyling....and practice practice practice......most ppl are wrong when they think stuff like freestyling...turntabling..playin the guitar...bballing...breaking......is all about talent.....i mean, not that talent doesn't take a role, but its such a small one compared to practicing.........but anywayz, yeah.....so i've been tryin to figure out and spit out all these rythmes.......tryin to get da flow goin......and what i've been starting to do is to shake my hand as i go......you know, with your fingers pointing out and then kinda twist your arm clockwise and anti-clockwise very quickly.....
so now that i've been doing that for quite a bit......i've noticed i've been doin that freestyling hand thingy all the time.....when i talk.....and especially when i'm tryin to explain something.......i nearly even accidently started to do the shaking thing durin my presentation in business communication class.......crazy man crazy...
So yeah, now that i'm on the subject.....i want to talk about actually freestyling......its funny how so many guyz (girls not interested..haha) have problems voicing out and practicing........haha.....i mean, yeah, maybe i wouldn't want to practice in front of crowds.....but its ok to do it with friends and stuff.....its not like we expect you to get that stuff down the first couple times around......c'mon guyz......not something to be embarrassed about.........its all good......obviously, not the next freestyler in town.....just chill...confidence for the ladies yo...

BOo BOo
AIRIK

oh, and also...i dunt try to be black..

Wow.....i'm bak.....its been quite a bit i must admit....considering i used to blog every couple days or so......can't be here for long tho......you will all understand soon....

I just turned in my psyfound h/w....or should i say ahm just did it for me.......yes, that would be technically the correct thing to say......let me emphasize 'TURNED IN'.........its there in the h/w box....with my name on it....it represents work from me.....hehe....alrite...we get the point.....

Yep......i got up way early today do get my h/w done with.........i plan to stick around at ahms a lil longer for this blog...and then go back to my apt to my mommy for lunch....then drive out for my guitar lesson...and lastly, class....java and psyfound......
Ok.....i just went through a lot of different things......this is to let those non-jhu readers catch with with my life..........yep, i got my apartment and my car......all setup and stuff cuz mommy came to visit me (hey, she got nuthin to do at home....had to follow daddy's orders and let her come).........but yeah, my place is all setup due to her visit.......so great tho...makes life so much easier, puttin the whole apt together......plus, home cooked food.....
Next thing.....YEAH!...i just started guitar lessons......its awesome.......i figured it'll be hard for me to get better without some direction....so now since i have my car, i can drive out for that now.......so so fun....i need a jamming partner man.......
Class has started for nearly a month.......work load has been ok so far......i am doin csf, intro java and bus com....so other than psyfound, everything should be able to be on top of......

Got no internet/DSL at home......yeah...maybe explains why i dunt blog often (well, ontop of my 'i dunno whether blog will continue thing').......

I lost motivation soooo soon...aite, gonna go...hopefully i'll come up with something more crazy/interesting next time...
Erik.

OH dang...forgot........The song of the moment....~~~ Til I Hear it From You - Gin Blossoms ~~~........very easily liked song.........its from the movie 'Empire Records'....aite

I feel alive. For the first time since i've returned to b'more, i feel alive. I can think clearly, and everything around me makes sense. I am finally enjoying a normal stable life. Nothing is going against me, and i am not craving for anything/anybody that will take me apart. As much as i feel alive right now, i really feel that i'm getting older too. I see all these freshmen hanging around campus, and it makes me feel that my crazy days are over. I'm nearly done with college already, omg. I might be only just half way through college, but in my mind, i'm soon done. My classes don't even rape anymore, that stuff is all over...my schedule is chill...all planned out....and i don't feel the long list of requirements for my degree threatening me anymore.
Its very odd to know that I've never thought as a kid, that i'd someday be sitting here talking about what i am right now. I never dreamed that i'd be sitting high up in this apartment near JH blogging while looking out the balcony. I can relate this to my future...that i have no damn clue what/where i will be 5 years later.

Its Friday nite. Not a reason to party anymore. Rather i'm sitting here alone at pisan's desk blogging. I just came back from bball......its either i'm outta shape, i'm getting older, or i'm finally understanding my body when its tired.....no more crazy bball workouts i used to have years ago......i'm finally learnin the basics of taking care of your own body....as stupid as it sounds, but i never gave an f about my body much before......but now that i learn of the risks i go through without taking care of it, i'm starting to spend the time to think again about the consquences and what i'm putting myself through...

I'm proposing that 'airik's ramblings' will end soon. yes, i'm sorry guyz. I really hope that i can keep this blogging thing for at least the next two years, but out of no-where i've suddenly come to the idea that its time to stop. Its weird, its had to explain, but its kinda becuz i feel that i've grown up. Its like i've passed this period of time when i've grown to become this much, and now its time to move on. No doubt, i've grown tremendously throughout the year of blogging, i would certainly admit that writing down my ideas and thoughts has helped me significantly. It helps me sum up what i need to realize, what i know, and puts it alltogether into words rather that scattered thoughts in my brain.
The thing is, i feel that its not upto me to decide upon whether i should keep the blogging or not. At this moment i'm doubting i will have much interest in doing so.....hey! who knows??....i might feel that i should do it later in the semester....but yeah, just letting you all know....

Its funny how every once in a while i'm get strange looks from peeps at skool...haha....its obviously the red highlights.......they'd stare at it, and want to comment on it, but nothing comes out of their mouth....hehe....interesting.....but yeah, i like it man..."punky" as i said originally...gonna post a pic of me with my highlights for those that haven't seen me for a bit.....thats if i can get that html shit at blogger to work....

Airik.
Is my crazy punky taste leaving me??

( sorry can't get to work yet..and not bothered..haha..)