Thursday, July 31, 2003

So my 2nd guitar pick broke last nite....
HAha, its funny how I make that connection with the fact that it shows how much I've been practicing and not maybe whether its because I'm strumming to hard or something....haha...but yeah, I was proud it broke on me.....

~~~ Dragon Ash - Underage Song ~~~ DA's first best single...Its pretty good...some classic Jap hip-hop for y'all to vibe with.....

I miss my electric guitar. Although I know I'll be bringing my current one back this coming Christmas, I'm seriously considering whether I should invest in another. Sometimes distortion just gives me a more full sound, the acoustic is too defined....too crisp...i guess its just not great to mess around with sometimes....

Its Thursday morning....office time...yes, I'm slacking.....hehe....I've got hand fulls of work from my supervisor and also this hk wealth creation project thing to work on...but oh well, its all good....
Probably tired from bball yesterday....argh....i can't believe bankers can play ball too..hahaa....or maybe they just weren't playing at the level/style I was......but yeah, got myself a couple more battle scars last nite....

Only through suffering and understanding others we realize more about our individual-self.

Airik

Tuesday, July 29, 2003

@Office...really shouldn't be doing this rite now....haha....

Hello and GoodBye

Hear my voices in heart,
Waterfalls in my sky.
The clouds move faster than mine.
Lonely, dry, I'm so high.
She scared me (but why?)
Like a butterfly she spread her wings,
While I cry in the world blind.

Hearing her beat in heart,
Infesting death calls me clear.
Her eyes near mine, fireworks, who denies.
Tears roll down my feet,
I'm broken, disorganized, dry (and why?)
Have I not learned her beat?
Am I an instrument of heat?

Imagine an ideal peace.
I blame time,
Hers grinding against mine.
She held me, and took my smile
So careful, I took the lie.
Now I'm demolished dry,
Hello and GoodBye.

Monday, July 28, 2003

Back.

~~~ Jimmy Eat World - Believe in What you Want ~~~ I've been getting into some Emo these dayz...especially Jimmy Eat World's stuff....check out their album 'clarity'..

Everyonce in a while I feel like I'm living in this world. I can feel my own two feet on the ground. I'm consious but I feel like I don't understand my own existence. I don't understand my consquences and I feel like there are so many things maybe I could have done better doing. I'm not saying I regret what I have done or did, but I feel like there are many more ways to deal with stuff, some eventually being things I'd have better off done instead and some not.

Either I've grown up a little or maybe I'm just over thinking things, but I'm starting to appreciate routine. Not that I don't like the feeling of being free, but I enjoy routine I have control over. Or to better put it, routine I create for myself. For example I like to look forward to guy's ball nite, I like to know that I'm scheduled for Kaplan after work. I guess routine makes me feel like I'm making more out of my time, it makes me feel scheduled. Keeps me away from time when I end up not doing anything at the end.

Its interesting how the only thing that really goes through my head day in and day out since I've gotten back is Hong Kong. Theres something so full and perplexing about it that keeps me on my feet 24/7. Everyday is seriously an adventure of its own. Theres so much to digest in a day I feel like I'm wasting it everyday by puking it back out. Its sort of scaring me cause one day I might get sucked into it and I wouldn't be able to get in touch with who I really am anymore.

Its funny how I don't have a single thing to write about when I'm finally in front of the comp...

Whoever you are. I'm glad.

Airik.

Its been awesome summer.

Sunday, July 20, 2003

I'm confused. I feel divergence.

Too many things are going on at one time. Its funny how I both want to stop and realize whats going on around me and also want to let time continue so that things will unfold on its own.

Hong Kong is so packed. My community is incredibly competitive. Maybe what I need to start do is reconsider the way I live my life here. Haha.. I think should start becoming more critcal of my methodologies....I say all this because I've grown up. All the kids of my age are starting to enter the work force. Whether smart, hardworking, ignorant, spoilt, lazy, or realistic will have to live their lives. I see entering the work force as the last chance for any to make serious changes to who they are. So how will we end up? Are we going to split into our social classes? Will the kids with less demanding jobs still be around those that have put in the effort to find a higher paid job?
I'm going to be honest here. I hang out in a community of "better off" families here at home. So how is inheritance going to interfere with our lives? Including myself, I see many combinations of personalities and family wealth. I wonder what will happen to everyone in 10 years time.

I find it awfully hard to be as "real" when I live in Hong Kong compared to the States.
airik.

Wednesday, July 16, 2003

I've been wanting to blog for sometime already...finally, my chance to do so.....
Its way past bedtime already....11PM!!!....So late!!!....hahha...yeah, i need my beauty sleep before work.....or maybe (to sound less gay) I dread waking up without enough sleep...i need/prefer >=10hours....yepyep...plus, the day goes be more quickly when I'm awake and focused....

Haven't had the time to check out any music these days...I guess I'm normally too tired after work and I don't bother to stop by the record store or anything.....I've been spending a lotta time on the guitar tho. I don't even realize I spend 1-2 hours on it everyday during the weekdays when i have work...last weekend I was averaging even more time playing... 3-4 hours??....

~~~ Morcheeba - Parts of the Process ~~~ Trip hop for the soul. Definitely nice and relaxing to listen to. I've been guitaring a lot over the album these dayz.

Hmmm....maybe i should talk about somethin else other than work and summer....
I've been thinking a lot about how it is like to grow up these dayz. Its crazy. We all grow up to find out how complex our world is. When I was young, I used to think I knew pretty much everything, but I now feel like I know nothing...seriously, nothing at all, even I doubt my own conscience, my own feelings.....I feel like everything i think of is probably so much more complicated in the real world.....i'm just a biased fool.....if everyday we are learning new things, then we must be currently pretty wrong about things....

I've been noticing how older adults think these dayz. Pretty much all adults older than me. I've been constantly fitting myself into their shoes trying to imagine what they had gone through and how their goals have changed as they grow up. I know someday, chances are that I'll go through the same changes and I'll start thinking about things like stability, family, work, heavy responsibility, etc......haha...to think about it even more, I'm living such a chill life right now......I don't think I'm fully appreciating my freedom and restless body....maybe I just won't ever til its over..

I guess one of the biggest things that I feel would have an impact on me is kids. I can't tell how I'd change then, but for one thing, I'm going to be a good dad like my father. I suppose it reflects how I've grown and seen my own dad be a father... I'd like my kids to go through a similar childhood too. Seriously, its only until I was nearly past my teens til I realized how much my parents had done for me. How much that had been done behind me all along.

Hahaha...I think I sound so silly...but I always had this thing about taking the mini-bus at night....like sending my significant other home or something.......its so romantic......it gives me that sticky intimate HK styled urban romance feeling......sort of like how New York City or Tokyo can be very romantic places for love......haha....but anywayz.....

Way way past bedtime.
Airik.

Friday, July 11, 2003

Damn, I love Hong Kong. I guess its just normal to be attached to where you belong from. Other than the fact that its sizzling hot here (yes, so take off all your clothes..haha), everythings pretty chill. I suppose only after I've traveled and lived in other parts of the world til I realize home is still home sweet home. Theres no replacement.

I suppose it all comes down to enjoying what you do.....I'm liking work...banking...Central....lunch with my co-workers or friends......and nearly everything else that comes with it. I guess Hong Kong brings out the real side of me, i'm more efficient and more hyped up for stuff.....while on the other hand, the States helps me find out who i am...i suppose thats where i spend more time reflecting my own character and becoming a better person...

Damn...its friday nite....seriously....no time to blog...theres a lot ahead of me.

~~~ Maroon 5 - Songs about Jane ~~~ get the album.
~~~ MJ Cole - Cut the Chase ~~~ must get album for uk-garage/2 step followers.

aiteaite.....really gotta run.
Erik.

Wednesday, July 02, 2003

back...

*phew*...had first day of work today....so damn tired.....its been two years....since Merril since I've put on a suit...tie, dress shoes and the whole nine yards......dang, my neck and shoulders were aching all throughout the day......its as if i were carrying a back pack full of stones......
Its cool tho....meeting some new lads......going through the hong kong work-summer experience all over again....hehehe....Yey! women in a work environment again!!......thats definitely cool...no more mutants like those in my biomed classes.......
I assume I'll get the hang of it in a week or two...after orientation when i finally figure out where and which floor i work ><; .....

Hong Kong is great. I think I've finally realized my home. I'm glad I didn't come back for a while, otherwise I'd continue to take this place for granted.......i suppose Asia is where I want to end up when I settle down....altho I'd definitely miss out on american sports.....like watching the superbowl, NCAA, NBA, etc.. with pizza and beers and all that......nothing can beat being around people who I grew up around with...eventho, i'm Americanized....and I don't act like the typical HK guy.....i feel like i'm still part of it.......especially Central, where people are busy, working and less fobby....I feel at home working in one of those sky scrapers.....I feel like this is where I belong.....not that I'm racist or anything, but I just can't imagine myself working in an office pretty much mostly consumed of whites......like, it'd still be chill and all that....but it just aint the same....the networking...the people..the attitude...

...haha...i got myself another pink floyd CD today....HK has such a bigger influence from European music......so so cool....i can't believe I spent an hour at HMV after work.....but yeah, definitely will be here with some cool music when i finally get an ear on them...

Airik.