Monday, July 28, 2003

Back.

~~~ Jimmy Eat World - Believe in What you Want ~~~ I've been getting into some Emo these dayz...especially Jimmy Eat World's stuff....check out their album 'clarity'..

Everyonce in a while I feel like I'm living in this world. I can feel my own two feet on the ground. I'm consious but I feel like I don't understand my own existence. I don't understand my consquences and I feel like there are so many things maybe I could have done better doing. I'm not saying I regret what I have done or did, but I feel like there are many more ways to deal with stuff, some eventually being things I'd have better off done instead and some not.

Either I've grown up a little or maybe I'm just over thinking things, but I'm starting to appreciate routine. Not that I don't like the feeling of being free, but I enjoy routine I have control over. Or to better put it, routine I create for myself. For example I like to look forward to guy's ball nite, I like to know that I'm scheduled for Kaplan after work. I guess routine makes me feel like I'm making more out of my time, it makes me feel scheduled. Keeps me away from time when I end up not doing anything at the end.

Its interesting how the only thing that really goes through my head day in and day out since I've gotten back is Hong Kong. Theres something so full and perplexing about it that keeps me on my feet 24/7. Everyday is seriously an adventure of its own. Theres so much to digest in a day I feel like I'm wasting it everyday by puking it back out. Its sort of scaring me cause one day I might get sucked into it and I wouldn't be able to get in touch with who I really am anymore.

Its funny how I don't have a single thing to write about when I'm finally in front of the comp...

Whoever you are. I'm glad.

Airik.

Its been awesome summer.

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