Balancing ideas and delivery

Music comes first today:

The All-American Rejects - Swing Swing
Collective Soul - The world I know
Thursday - Understanding in a car crash
Mos Def & Massive Attack - I against I
Audioslave - Show me how to live, Like a stone, etc....
Love psychedelico - Lady Madonna

These dayz, I feel so numb. I feel like i'm living two lives. My focus and ego has been very supportive of the semester. Keeping me always in track, keeping me within my limits emotionally. I think its about time for me to move onto the next big thing.

One thing I've realized over the past couple months......my peers look highly of me?!.....like, as in, they see me a lot higher than i think of myself......this might sound real crazy.....but WOW!!!......I've never considered myself a smart person and i've never thought of myself as successful (i still want to, but i don't see myself as one)......like, erik = smart has just never gone through my brain........its crazy.....especially when i hear that from ppl i know that know me well or have known me for the longest time.....its like, shit!!...i only say that to ppl i look upto and i know for sure they're gonna fly....so ppl feel that way of me?!!....woah.....its a lot to take, i never thought that highly of myself.....i find that the biggest complement of all time.......ppl who believe in me more than i believe of myself......

Anywayz, enough ego talk (i dunt, but just in case anybody else finds that it is)..........i can't be bothered to blog no more....